This Letter is For You
This Letter is For You
This is a letter I wrote for myself, for you, for each and every one of us that knows what it’s like to be broken and hurting but still fighting. For each of us that hopes that 2020 will be better than 2019, that this next decade will be better than the last. For each of us that hopes, against all odds, our next chapter will be better than the one we are finishing right now. This is a letter to you.
We’ve been called victims. survivors. thrivers.
But this is the time to become something more than the name you’re given by society. To not let fear stop you this time. To stay humble, but fierce. To know when it's time to show your teeth. This time, use every skill you have, use your fear and rage as the tools they are.
You were and are all of this. You’ve told this to yourself before, but you got scared. It's okay to be scared - what you went through was hell, but it taught you so much. This time, you're coming to the game with every tool, with every sense connected to the universe, and a whole army of strong individuals to support you. Never be ashamed of your arsenal, but don't feel like you always have to show it. Your strength is in your weakness. Let them see who they want to see, because they are all you. When it's time to take off all the masks, you'll know.
When karma has taken its course and change has been made...you will know. You will be able to speak every last truth. This time, don't hate yourself for surviving - congratulate yourself. You didn't like the rules of the game...so you changed them. You stared at the reaper and said, “Not today!” because this time it's for real. We're playing for keeps, for blood, for lives... the stakes are so much higher.
The lives of a lot of people count on the steps you take next. Tread carefully, make a plan of action and make sure it feels right. Keep this in mind - pain will forever be a part of you. Accept it and use it. You already have been, but this time don't hate the pain. Get comfortable with it, let it be a daily reminder that you are alive and have battles to fight...and that, that right there, is the reason you're alive. You've fought, in any way possible, to stay alive. Fleeing and freezing are facets of survival and have been necessary for so long - these instinctual drives that are a part of our genetic structure. This time, accept that it's a part of you.
Come back to this place, often, but not so often you drown. Find your balance...which will always be off....but look for it anyway. Remember to come from a place of understanding, knowledge, determination - some people may not be ready for that, and that's okay. This time, don't be afraid to burn bridges, stand in the way, or defend yourself. You have to be both the hunter and the prey. You have to know when it's time to step back, and when it's time to go for blood.
Remember that you are not broken, you are uniquely built to withstand the trauma you have endured. For those of us that look at tonight as both a bittersweet end and a beautiful beginning, this letter is for you. Stay strong, love yourself and those around you, take on trauma but not so much you forget yourself. Stay rooted in pain, but blooming with hope. From one survivor to another...This time is our time.